Why Michael Vick Is Not A Real Quarterback

I wasn't sold on this guy when he entered the league. I wasn't sold on him his first five years in the league. I was thinking about buying into him this season -- until he sat out the Patriots game.

Why? Quick quiz: How many times in his career has Vick thrown for three or more touchdowns in one game? (Answer a bit later)

Vick's replacement, Matt Schaub, some guy I had never heard of even though this is his third season with the Falcons, shredded an injury-depleted New England defense (which is still better than most of the league's healthy defenses) for 298 yards and three touchdowns. He moved around in the pocket, even scrambled a little bit, and connected with receivers most people didn't know existed on the Falcons. I mean, someone besides Alge Crumpler caught a pass. In fact, six different receivers caught passes.

OK, maybe that's not entirely fair. In the first four games of the season, Vick connected with 6 receivers on 12 completions (a win against Philly), 5 on 11 completions (a loss to Seattle), 6 on a BIG 15 completions (win vs. Buffalo), and 6 on 6 completions before he was injured in a win against the Vikings.

For the record, Schaub completed 18 passes in his losing effort to New England, and 5 to 4 receivers in relief against Minnesota.

That's the difference between Vick and guys like (I can't believe I'm using these two names in the same sentence) Brady and Schaub. Brady and Schaub are "quarterbacks." Vick is a "playmaker." Ya, he's fantastic, and he wins a lot of games. But, please, stop calling him a great "quarterback." He isn't.

OK, time for our quiz answer. Matt Schaub, who has played in only 11 NFL games and started only two, had three touchdowns and 298 yards in the loss to New England. How many times in Vick's four-plus year career has he thrown for three or more touchdowns in his career?

Answer: Zero.

This isn't like Pedro Martinez being a Hall of Fame pitcher and never throwing a no-hitter, when even Derek Lowe has thrown a no-hitter. Lowe was an anomaly. It's "really hard" to throw a no-hitter. Just about any quarterback with more than a few starts in the NFL has thrown three touchdowns in a game.

I could have picked almost any QB stat in the book. Vick isn't great in any of them, except winning percentage, which some people will argue is the only one that counts. I agree, that's the most important stat for a team. But when you're ready to decide who gets a bronze bust in Canton, no one with a good conscience and half a brain could vote for Vick -- unless the rest of his career is lot different.

And for those of you who say, "Well, what if he wins two or three Super Bowls?" Well, I wouldn't hold my breath, and (you've heard my say it before) as Drill Instructor Sgt. Rodruiguez used to say, "If? IF? If grasshoppers had machine guns, birds wouldn't f*** with them." I'll say this, any Super Bowl team with a decent defense and an excellent coach should be able to game-plan for Vick for one game.

You know what I wish Atlanta would do? Bring in the wishbone. Just admit the fact that you don't have a normal quarterback and throw "DVD" (that's running back [Warrick] Dunn, Vick and RB [T.J.] Duckett, for the uninitiated) into the backfield and run the wishbone. Now that would be exciting.

Wouldn't it?